Catherine's profileThomcat's tidbitsPhotosBlogListsMore  |  Tools Help |
|
February 26 Overcoming the comfort zone
I think there are two types of people. First there are the introverts (shy, reserved people) who get “charged” up by having time alone. Then there are the extroverts (outgoing, social people) who get “charged” up by being in crowds or with a large group of friends. I happen to be an introvert. My favorite evening activity is to stay at home with my family and either watch movies or play games. Generally I don’t like going out in the evenings. I wouldn’t consider myself shy though and I do enjoy socializing and being around people. Every once in a while I “force” myself to do something that isn’t as comfortable as just being at home. A couple of nights ago we had a social for the adults in our church. The theme of it was game show night and the game shows we played were “The Newly Wed game”, “Family Feud” and “Musical chairs/Scavenger hunt” Ok the last one wasn’t a game show but it was pretty fun. They drew names out of a hat to see who was going to participate. Kevin and I both got called up to play in the Family Feud game, but on opposite teams. My initial thought was “Oh I don’t want to get up in front of all these people and make a fool of myself.” I went up anyway and it ended up being a lot of fun. I even came up with some pretty good answers. Because of my “Introvert” tendancies I’ve always struggled to make friends. Maybe I was shy in elementary school and Junior High, but I remember dreading lunch time because I didn’t know who I could sit with. I didn’t have any close friends and found the whole situation very uncomfortable. In High school I almost became an extrovert. I was involved with music, drama and really enjoyed school. Still, if I was put in a new situation where I didn’t know the people I would revert back to my reserved personality. As an adult I’ve learned to adapt in most situations. I can usually mask my appearance of being shy or unsure. In situations where I need to be out in front of people or take charge of a situation I can do that, however I don’t seek out these opportunities. Even setting up my web space was intimidating to me because I wasn’t sure what to do and didn’t know if I would have anything worthy to write about. As I browse through other peoples websites I’m tempted to write comments on their blogs but many times I don’t because I feel like an outsider or intruder. It reminds me of those lonely lunch hours in middle school when I wondered who to sit with. Most people have things that are uncomfortable for them to do. When we stretch ourselves, we grow. Today I think I’ll try to make some new friends. I may even try to “sit with them at lunch”. After the day is done, I’ll sit back and think about tomorrow. What can I do outside of my comfort zone tomorrow that will enrich my life and make me a better person? February 20 "Sammamish or bust"Last night the kids and I decided to watch a movie so we put RV in. It's a goofy comedy with Robin Williams about a family taking an RV trip and how just about everything that could go wrong, did go wrong. It all seemed rather silly and unlikely. Then I remembered a couple of trips like that I've had. The van trip I'm about to describe happened in February of 2002 when we drove from Idaho to Sammammish Washington, where we were living at the time.:
Preparations were carefully made for the trip home. The bags were all packed. Food was bought and prepared and goodbye's were said. We were looking at a 12 1/2 hour van ride with Mom, Me and my five children. All indications were there for a relatively dull trip. Even the weather on weather.com said we would only experience "partly cloudy". I could live with that. We decided to leave just a little early because Kevin was home and wouldn't have to leave for Alaska until about 6:30 at night. We left at 5a.m. (4a.m. Washington time) The drive was relatively uneventful for the first 50 miles. Mom dozed a little. Michael and Chris started picking at each other and the other kids figited around but eventually dozed off. Then it started getting foggy with a little snow. Before long the roads turned snowcovered and the poor visibility made it difficult to say for sure where the lanes were. I took my half out of the middle for the most part. Occassionally I would feel the loud vibrations when I got too close to the side of the road and I'd have to move over again. Our progress was slowed considerably as we averaged about 50 or 60 miles an hour. We drove about 250- 300 miles in "partly cloudy" conditions. I have never seen such "white out" conditions for "partly cloudy". One white rabbit ran across the road and was dangerously close to getting squashed. When the sun came up it was really hard to tell. It was a bit lighter out but with the storm clouds, fog and snow it didn't seem like it. We weren't quite out of the snow but we did seem to have gone past the worst part of it. I kept turning the heat up because I was really starting to get cold. Then we discovered that it was just blowing out cold air. Great! No heat! This was not a good thing but we passed around the blankets and told the kids in back to wrap one around Rachel. Michael and Chris were continuously fighting, picking at each other or the girls and generally being obnoxious. I was ready to duct tape them both to the roof. I stopped before long and was able to reach Kevin on the cell phone. He said it sounded like we were out of antifreeze. The battery on my phone died but I managed to find out where to pour it first. I bought a gallon of it ($8.00) and poured almost the whole thing in it. I had the engine off at the time. We pulled out as I mentally patted myself on my back for "taking care of the situation". I didn't even get 5 miles down the road when the check engine light came on. My temperature was very high. I found an off ramp and exited again. We sat there for about 5 minutes and tried turning the engine off, turning up the heater etc.... Nothing really helped. It did go down a bit and we thought we would try a little further. The other problem we had was that there was no signal on the cell phone. I had a plug in in the car so batteries weren't the problem any more. We drove from the off ramp to the on ramp and it went really high again. There was another car off the side of the road and Mom suggested we go and ask for help. I did and two guys came over and looked at my engine. I told them the history of it all and they thought my thermometer was not working. We poured all the water we had and they had into the "hole" and we went on our way. They suggested we got to the next town and buy another thermometer and have it installed. We drove to the next town where I was able to get Kevin on the line again. He said that I had put the antifreeze in wrong and should have let the engine run while I did it so there would be no air pockets. I went and bought another gallon of antifreeze and poured it in and then another and another etc.... I couldn't believe it was taking so much. Then we noticed a green puddle coming from under the van. I looked under the van and discovered a hole in one of the pipes, spraying antifreeze on the ground. Well I'm not about to buy more of the antifreeze and watch it wash away. Unfortunately we didn't have the common sense to pull the gallon containers out of the garbage and fill them with water. We just filled up every popcan and drink container we had and took off down the road. Do you know that you can travel 350 to 400 miles with a leaky radiator pipe if you stop often enough??? We found out that you can but usually only got about 20 to 25 miles at a time. In one rest stop I had 4 kids running back and forth from the bathroom with can's of water as Mom and I poured them in the "hole". I'm sure we must have been a sight. A few people asked if we were having problems but there was really nothing anybody could do to help us. I did find a store that sold automotive supplies and bought some emergency hose repair tape ($9.00) and wrapped it around all the pipes that I thought the leak was coming from. That let us drive about 50 miles before it started all over again. I had to re-wrap it and helped for a while longer but still didn't solve the problem. Michael and Chris were being worse than ever. I had separated them and that helped a little but they must have had a pincher bug in their shorts because neither one of them would behave. Chris dozed off once and I really appreciated the quiet. About an hour later when I heard him talking I yelled out "Who woke up Chris!!!" I guess my disposition was a little grumpy at that point. Jen and Marie had their moments but were pretty good for most of the time. Rachel was as good as gold. What a little sweetheart. We were getting close to home (within 100 miles) but were in need of more water. I pulled in this little town hoping to find a gas station but there wasn't anything. We even thought about getting water out of the puddles but they were too muddy. Then we saw a shop with some lights on. I knocked on the door and this guy came out. I told him the problem and he had two gallon containers there. We poured the water in and he filled them up for me again and let me take them with me. What a lifesaver that was. Of course this whole time I had been keeping in touch with Kevin. He wasn't sure if he should postpone his trip or what to do. He got our friend Kirk to take him to the airport but I could still talk to him on his cell phone. It looked like we would actually make it. We finally got home. It only took us about 16 hours to get here. The kids go bouncing in the house, thrilled to be home. Rachel is running all over the place, glad she doesn't have to be cooped up in the car seat anymore. Mom and I stagger in, ready to collapse. Before long Lindsey and Tyson are over here and our kids are having a great time. They had also made some big signs in our kitchen, "welcoming us home". My friend Christine made us a whole dinner. I really didn't think I was hungry, (too upset I guess) but it sure tasted good and really seemed to help our nerves calm down. Michael and Chris were even good for about 10 minutes but then one of them went screaming up the stairs and I sent them both to bed. What a relief to have them finally separated and unconsious. We all followed soon after that and hoped we wouldn't have to live through an ordeal like that for a long, long time. I'm sure I'm not the only one who's had a trip like this. I'd love to read about other peoples disaster trips if for no other reason than to know I'm not alone. February 16 Past, Present & FutureA few nights ago we had a meeting for all the youth in our church and their parents. It was called Standards night and topics can vary from being morally clean to being honest. The topic for this night was on family history and learning about our ancestors. Another word for that is genealogy but when some people hear that word they instantly tune out because they think it’s so boring. That must have been what some of the kids (and adults) were thinking when the topic first came up. As I sat there and listened I realized that it was really quite interesting. One man got up and started talking about one of his ancestors and about their family. He started naming off the dates and names and I was instantly VERY interested because those names were all so familiar. I kept thinking that maybe that was MY family he was talking about and maybe the stories he was describing were about my relatives. The main person he was talking about was Inger Larsen. I went home right after the meeting and looked up that name on my genealogy. I was about a 100 years off and from the wrong country but it was still exciting and got me thinking more about my own family. I’m pretty lucky to have so may from my family keeping records and stories from my own ancestors. My brother “Storyteller” has written down so many stories of our ancestors and I’m deeply grateful for that. It’s also interesting how you can look at the family group sheets and the dates and places of births, deaths, marriages etc… It tells a story of the family and by reading through them I really start to feel like I’m getting to know them. I’ll never forget looking at one group sheet and seeing that 3 of the children died within 6 months of each other. It just about broke my heart. I could only imagine the grief that the mother must have felt. We have some pictures and even some personal stories from some of our ancestors but not as many as I would like. Today it’s so easy to record a person’s life. We have video cameras and can capture day to day events, show where we live and things we’re interested in. The voices, laughter, musical talent can be forever recorded for future generations. We have digital cameras and memory sticks where 1000’s of photos can be stored, downloaded, printed, emailed or even posted on our own webspace. I don’t like handwriting in a diary or journal but typing is easy for me so I have a journal program on my computer. At times I copy and paste entries I’ve sent to my Mom and put them in my journal so I don’t have to type them twice. I know some people who record their history or journal digitally. Future generations will easily be able to see, hear, and learn all about their ancestors---each of us. As much as I want to know who my ancestors are and learn what they were like, I would like my descendants to know me and my family. I want them to know why some things are important to me, what kind of a life we had, what trials we’ve overcome and how we did that. I guess I look at it like this. The past, present and future are all linked together. We live in the present and are the vital link that connects the other two. I pray today that I won’t be the weak link.
{Some websites to discover your own family history are listed below}
www.familysearch.org (Best choice and it’s free) February 14 My SweetheartThis morning I kissed my husband goodbye as he left for the airport on yet another business trip. He’ll only be gone for 2 days this time but I miss him even on short trips. Today is Valentines Day and since he isn’t here with me then I thought I would reminisce about him, how we met, our courtship and our marriage. I met Kevin the summer after I graduated from college. We were both working in Jackson Hole Wyoming in some of the tourist retail shops on the main square. That town fills up in the summer with not only tourists but 1000’s of young people who go there to work as well. It was a dance. I remember looking at him after he asked me to dance and thinking, “Oooh! He is good looking!” He asked me later on in the evening to dance again and I couldn’t remember his name. He showed me his belt and it had “Kevin” cut out of the leather. I didn’t forget his name after that. We lived in the same complex so it was pretty easy to hang out with him and his roommates. Our first date was a motorcycle ride. We rode about 20 minutes to a little ski village and then back again. That was about it. I found out later that he was going to quit dating me because he found out how young I was compared to him. Our first kiss was outside my apartment. We were just goofing around and he kissed me. It wasn’t the most romantic setting but that didn’t seem to matter. I was horrified the next morning to wake up with a cold sore on my lip. I was pretty embarrassed about it and didn’t want to see him. It actually was a few days before we saw each other again so it all worked out. We dated all summer long, along with other people as well. I remember meeting his parents for the first time. We drove his pickup for about an hour to the Palisades dam and there they were fishing. It was probably midnight by the time we got there. Little did I know that fishing was so much a part of the family I swear they all had fish water in their veins. I could go on and on about our courtship but I’ll just say that we ended up getting engaged on January 6, 1987 after he threw me in the bathtub fully dressed. Maybe it was a test to see if he could be really ornery and still have me love him. I did. We were married 6 months later on June 12, 1987. We spent the first 10 years of our marriage in Anchorage Alaska. I think the maddest I ever got with him was during a fishing trip. We were trying to paddle our rubber boat and the wind was blowing us upstream. I was so tired and we had to get downstream in order to catch our float plane. I don’t even remember why we were arguing but he quit paddling. I was about ready to push him overboard that day. We don’t get mad at each other like that very often. We’ve never yelled angrily at each other or said things to hurt. I consider myself pretty lucky. We moved to Colorado Springs and lived there for 4 years and that was good. The last year was difficult for my husband though, and it probably put a little stress on our marriage. It also made us closer as we relied on each other. We spent one year in Washington and then moved back to Alaska. This June we will have been married 20 years. A few of my favorite memories of our marriage and of my husband are:
I read an article in the newspaper today that said “Studies show that trying something new with a spouse can go a long way toward reigniting love. Couples who did new things such as an art class or sailing showed far more improvement in the quality of their marriage that those who did the same things every week.” My “sweetheart” and I have been married almost 20 years and we have so many memories. I love him more and more each passing year. I look forward to making 20 more years of memories together, trying new things, and then 20 more after that. I have a lot to be grateful for and I know that many people aren’t as lucky as I am.
February 06 Workin' the Pink PagodaLast Friday our family drove down to Kenai Alaska to spend the weekend. We bought a house there about a year ago with the intentions of fixing it up. We didn't pay much over land value for it and thought this would be the perfect way to get our children involved in a project. I think it's always good to teach kids how to work. We also offered them a cash incentive so it's almost like a job as well. I have to describe this house. It has 3 levels, it's pink with maroon trim. It's built in the 70's and still has the original appliances, carpet, bathroom fixtures etc... I think the lady that lived there never had a professional contractor there in her life as everything has been fixed in a "mickey mouse" way. You can stand in different areas of the house and count 4-5 different carpets within 5 feet of each other, 4-5 different kinds of paneling in one room and different molding in just about every room in the house. Some of the windows have lost their seal or are busted, (A couple of the windows are in front and show the steps going up.... wierd!) the sinks and bathtubs are stained with iron or something but they look terrible. The floor creaks in places and in one room there is a 8 inch pipe coming out of the floor. The lady also really liked pink and much of the house is decorated in that color. We've even knicknamed the house "The Pink Pagoda". The yard has a big need for improvement as well. It has trees that need to be taken down, brush that needs to be clear cut, stumps poking out of the lawn and a split rail fence that looked like rotting wood. The rain gutters look like they're about ready to fall off and the roof needs to be redone. Why on earth would be buy something in such terrible shape? This house happens to sit on the banks of the world famous Kenai River. We have a great view of the river and can even walk down some stairs and go fishing off our property. The house itself has some unique challenges and we're always plotting and planning what we can do to "fix" all the problems it has. There's something so rewarding about turning something so ugly into something beautiful. I will be spending the better part of my summer here scraping walls, painting, tiling, knocking down walls etc... and my family will be right there with me working on it too. I have found that some of my best conversations with my kids have either been in the car going somewhere or when we're working on a project together.
My parents taught me to work. They didn't buy houses that needed fixing but we lived on a farm and there was always plenty of work to do there. I remember my main jobs were gathering eggs and working in the salesroom. I would guess that my Dad had about 50,000 chickens so it would take a few hours to gather all the eggs. One of the coops was pretty hard. We had to wear waders and walk up and down the aisles. I didn't mind that as much as the dust and fumes I had to breathe in. The salesroom was easy. I would just make sure the shelves were stocked and wait for customers to come to our little store. Sometimes I'd even stay at home and just watch out the window. If I saw a car coming then I had to run across the field to our store. I got to be pretty fast and sometimes even did it barefoot. I ran even faster barefoot because I worried about stepping on something alive. (worms, mice etc...) Extra jobs that paid money included candeling eggs and packing chickens. It took 4 people to run the candeling equipment which cleaned, graded, weighed and packaged all the eggs. We then put them in cases and in the walk-in refridgerator before they were shipped to stores. At the beginning of that summer I also worked at Dairy Queen but soon quit that job as I earned more money on the farm candeling eggs and I had all my nights and weekends off. (I was a teenager needing clothes money and a social life) Packing chickens only happened once or twice a year. It was another yucky job that was tiring and hard but you could earn quite a bit of $$ for a days work. Quite a bit to me was anywhere from $20-$50. I also worked one winter cleaning the grader every night and gathering eggs every morning to earn enough money to pay for a trip to Europe with my school. I know that some of the kids didn't have to work at all but I was so happy for the opportunity to go I didn't mind a bit. I also felt like I "earned" that trip so it meant more. I'm grateful that I learned to work in my youth. It has helped me throughout my life and been a blessing to me.
I've worried about my kids and that I'm not giving them enough opportunities to work like I did. I'm proud of them when we have a service project for our church and see them working hard and not goofing off or complaining like some of the kids tend to do. Around our house the kids (boys and girls) all do dishes and clean or cook because we don't have a farm they can work in. We do have a fixer upper house though. When we finish our work there, I hope to have a beautiful home on the river and children with good characters and strong work ethics. I also hope to have had many laughs and fun times as we talk and spend the time working together. |
|
|
